North River & the December Book

North River, my book club's November book, did not disappoint. It was raw and gritty, yet soft and sweet at the same time. The protagonist's experiences and thoughts on love, forgiveness, acceptance, and compassion were beautiful. The use of New York's Lower East Side, the Meatpacking District, and Little Italy as characters was palpable: I saw the North River and felt the wind coming off it, smelled its brackishness. I could smell and taste Angela's simple Italian meals; I lived vicariously through Carlito's experiences on his first train ride, his first hot dog, his first plate of spaghetti, his trip to Coney Island. I recognized Pete Hamill's understanding of and love for New York in how he was able to capture its ugliness, beauty, prejudice, and senses of unity/community in little ways and big. Overall, this was a very well-written novel, not rushed, but not drawn out unnecessarily; descriptive yet to the point--just like New York. Kudos to Hamill.

The December book is going to be quite a departure from the more serious and "heavy" books we've been reading; it's called Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry a Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office
This should be nice and light reading for the holiday month. i hope we all enjoy it. Happy reading!

*** PS: I just finished reading Peony in Love, by Lisa See--much better than Shanghai Girls, but still not as good as Snow Flower and the Secret Fan. I also happened upon A Father's Law, by the legendary Richard Wright, in the Bargain Books section of B&N. I can't wait to sink my teeth into it.

Sonia

Haiku

we are sudden stars

you and i exploding in

our blue black skins

Written by Sonia Sanchez

October & November Books

The October book for the online book club followers was Fortune's Rocks, by Anita Shreve. We'll be discussing it in person next week, and I can't wait--I am so loving this book! Apologies for the late post.

The November book is North River, by Pete Hamill.

Details about both books can be viewed by clicking the titles in the side navigation. Happy reading!

My Last Day @ 30

As my 30th year in this world comes to an end, I've been doing a lot of introspection at The Sanctuary. This has been a tumultuous, unpredictable, exciting, heart-breaking and heart-mending year. On this last day, I am filled with a melancholic happiness--as much of an oxymoron as that is: for having said goodbye to things and people (one person in particular) and places that have occupied special places in my heart for a very long time, I feel a great loss; meanwhile I feel utter contentment for what my life has become as a result. Playing "catch up" after moving to New York didn't take as long as I was dreadfully expecting; I'm proud to say I am making up for lost time and catching up to where I believe I should be rather quickly.

30 has definitely been a wake-up call for me in more ways than one. The universe showed me the signs and told me I needed to get my life in order by the time I reached 30, the "I am officially a grown-up" year, and I obediently listened, no matter how deleterious I felt this new journey might be. As Oprah said once, "Always continue the climb. It is possible for you to do whatever you choose, if you first get to know who you are and are willing to work with a power that is greater than ourselves to do it." That is exactly what I have done and strive to do for the rest of my life; I believe I am the better for it and will continue to improve from 31 on.

Forgot Again!!!

The September book is Gentlemen and Players, by Joanne Harris.
So far, I'm really liking how twisted and sinister it is... :)

Backlog of Books

I've received complaints from people following my book club selections online. I apologize for my slippage. Here's what we have read over the past few months:

Midnight's Children: A Novel, Salman Rushdie
The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao, Junot Diaz (highly recommended and loved by all)
Shanghai Girls, Lisa See

And we have just started reading our August choice, Sag Harbor, by Colson Whitehead.
And for those who aren't very observant, I DO update the "Books I've Recently Read" section on the right navigation of this page. This list includes what I read outside of the book club selections, as well.

Happy reading to all of my online members!

Friday's Child

Friday's child.....Hard luck is her brother
Friday's child.....Her sister's misery
Friday's child.....Her daddy they call hard times
Friday's child.....That's me

Friday's child.....Born a little ugly
Friday's child.... Good looks passed her by..oh
Friday's child.....Makes something look like nothing
Friday's child.....Am I..ya

Friday's child.....Never climbed no mountain
Friday's child.....She ain't even gonna tray..oh
Friday's child.....Whom they'll forget to bury
Friday's child.....Am I

Things Come Together

As I prepare for my move and bring all the things from my former life in Miami to my new grown-up life in NYC, it's come to my realization that even though things can completely fall apart, there's always a way to bring them back together. It's not like this is a newsflash, or something I just learned: this is just something that I'm experiencing in a whole new way.

On the outside, I always look like everything is fine and dandy; I never really want people to think otherwise--it's no one's business but my own. However, there are instances when I feel that sharing my experiences and circumstances with others might help those who feel like things have fallen apart for them. So, I will share this:

My life was a wreck and it was all my fault. I screwed things up horribly and have been suffering the consequences silently for a long time. Only by taking a few steps back am I able to say that things are now coming up roses. Yes, they are still seedlings, but I can already smell their sweet scent. Because of the life I've led, no one can truly understand how nervous/excited/happy/scared I am to ride this new wave; none of it matters though, I am jumping in and savoring the splash.

Remember

Remember
by Christina Rosetti

Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you plann'd:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.

Oh, Canada!

I was watching commercials for the first time in quite a while, and saw a Canadian tourism ad that bothered the crap out of me. It was of a man filming the melting of a beautiful ice cap; off-screen you hear the man whooping and cheering as he watches. Does he, not to mention the ignoramuses who approved this commercial, not realize that he was filming the destruction of out planet?!? That melting ice caps and glaciers are a sign of all the stress and damage the human race has inflicted on the Earth? How is this a good advertisement for anything, let alone stand for a tourist attraction?

People can be really stupid sometimes.

Walking for Me & You

Saturday morning, after a late night flight from Vegas, I participated in the Revlon Run/Walk Against Cancer 5K that I wrote about a couple of weeks ago. I again, want to thank everyone for their show of support through their words of encouragement and their donations.

I didn't think that I would get emotional, but seeing the huge turnout of people (men, women, and children of all ages and backgrounds, totaling over 40,000 people) enthusiastically walking and running from Times Square through Central Park was so moving. As my mom and I walked together, we noticed that on some people's backs were homemade signs saying things such as: "I'm a Survivor: 13 Years," "In Memory of...," "In Support of...", and I couldn't help but think of all the women in my life or women with whom I've come in contact over the years, who have all been affected by breast cancer. As I walked and looked at groups of women crying, holding hands in solidarity, hugging each other and reaching out to one another, I got more and more choked up. I began thinking of my grandmother who died and I almost lost it right there on 7th Avenue; my aunt who is a survivor with both of her breasts removed and never batted an eyelash, and all of my friends' mothers who have been diagnosed and/or treated for breast cancer. I walked for them, the memory of them, and in support of them and every woman out there. I am considered a high risk candidate for breast cancer, so I was walking for myself, too.

Listening to Ciara, Jessicas Alba and Biel, Jennifer Connelly and Jimmy Fallon all speak on the subject and how they've been affected by cancer in women, made me want to get up there and speak on it, too! While I was watching them, a group of women came and stood by me, all with t-shirts that read: "Can't We At Least Get Early Detection?" I went up to them and told them that I liked their shirts; their response was to hug me. Again, I almost burst into tears--they were all already crying. But you could see the strength in their eyes and feel the determination in their hearts to make a difference.

If we could all be strong together, what a difference we could really make.

City Harvest-Giving Back & Being Grateful

Wednesday night my mother and I went to a charity event for an organization called City Harvest. This 25 year old group of volunteers and workers rescue food from markets, hotels, restaurants, etc., to feed the hungry all over New York. I was so touched by the giving spirits of the people who founded and run this project that I feel compelled to volunteer whatever time I have to this noble cause. Only $1.40 can feed a person for a week; that's cheaper than a train ride. So I figure, the more I walk, the more transportation money I save that can feed a hungry child or an elderly person who can't feed him/her -self. I won't miss that money, and I'll be better off for having "sacrificed" it. And that's just one of many things I plan to do to help the people involved, which include such notables as Rachel Ray, Eric Ripert, American Express, Credit Suisse, DKNY, and all the "little people" who aren't famous that make this all possible.

A man who is a truck driver shared his life story with us, telling us how he was homeless 20 years ago and was in soup kitchen lines, wondering how he was going to feed his family. A worker at the kitchen, part of City Harvest, suggested that he could work with them since he was jobless, had no place to go, and could use the help. Fast forward 20 years, and this man has a steady job, can feed himself and his family, and is helping others in their time of need. What could be better or feel more rewarding than that? Listening to him and seeing all the people who need aid, makes me feel so grateful for everything I have. I wrote not too long ago to complain about not having my own place--now I feel like a fool. Sometimes it takes occasions like this dinner to put things into perspective. I am one of the lucky ones, and I know that. I will not take for granted; rather I will give back as a token of my thanks to the universe.

People now more than ever, need to band together to help those who can't help themselves. These number will continue to climb as the recession in this country continues to lay workers off of jobs they've held for years, as more and more people can't afford the houses they live in; as graduates come out of college and into a workforce that can't accommodate them, and as senior citizens can't afford to retire because they no longer have pensions and/or not enough social security with which to sustain a peaceable life, we must lend a hand whenever we are able. I vow to do my part, give up the superficial outings and purchases to uplift the rest of my community. I urge you to do the same.

Volunteer here.

Book Club Books

I've been asked a few times to keep posting the books my book club has been reading, but I keep forgetting to. We just finished reading The Way to Paradise, by Mario Vargas-Llosa, which was one of the best takes on historical fiction I have ever read. There was an overall consensus that it was a great read when my girls discussed it two nights ago at a delicious Peruvian restaurant I frequent in NYC called Pio Pio.

The April book is Jitterbug Perfume, by Tom Robbins. I'm one-third of the way through this book, and so far I'm enjoying it; it's fantastical, philosophical, witty and fun. I can't wait for everyone else to read it so we can delve into deep conversations about this one. Each of our beliefs, philosophies, and views on life itself will be revealed, I predict.

So there you have it, my avid readers. Enjoy!

Women Against Cancer

I recently signed up to do a 5k from Times Square to Central Park for the Revlon Run/Walk: Women Against Cancer and am so excited. It's on May 2nd, and I've decided to run it--well my run is really a "wog," but we don't need to be technical here. ;)

For those in the NYC area, please come out and support this worthy cause, or sponsor me! I'd greatly appreciate it. Just click here to donate on my fund raising page. I just hope the weather's nice; if it starts raining or is cold however, then maybe I'll finish in record time!

Calling a Spade a Spade

A very educated and cool girlfriend of mine in Miami (which is hard to come by) posted a funny, insightful note today about how sensitive certain words, slang, and phrases have become since Obama became our president. Race has always been a hot topic, but now that we have a black man in office, everyone seems to be a bit more careful with their word choice. Here's what Dianna wrote today:

I can't help but laugh when I hear public figures tap dance around certain terms that they would not hesitate to use if Obama was white. This learned gentleman was trying to explain the possibilities for negotiations with Iran on Diane Reem this morning and he actually stuttered out the following:

"...that's something they (Iran) never received with the Bush administration, and that's something they've gotten in sp....uh, great quantities, from the Obama administration."

Talk about quick thinking! The word he wanted was SPADES, the idiom for which is "in spades": To a considerable degree: They had financial trouble in spades.

The definition of the word spade itself however, causes concern:
Spade 2 (spd) n.1. Games
a. A black, leaf-shaped figure on certain playing cards.
b. A playing card with this figure.
c. also spades (used with a sing. or pl. verb) The suit of cards represented by this figure.
2. Offensive slang used as a disparaging term for a Black person.

He obviously realized very quickly that might not be the best choice...it's so silly that this kind of panic has to happen at all, but I suppose I'd rather have them err on the side of polite and respectful. Plus, it's kinda entertaining to hear them scramble to recover. :)

I agree, Dianna. A lot about this topic has been cropping up as of late; there are subtle hints all over the media. 30 Rock, a show I watch religiously, jokes about it all the time. For example, when Alec Baldwin's character was dating Salma Hayek, who was acting as a Puerto Rican nurse, he was stumbling for the "right thing" to call her, as if Puerto Rican sounded derogatory somehow. There are other instances they portray that I see a lot in real life, like non-black people not knowing what to call black people. They stutter and stumble, confused and conflicted about whether to say "African-American," or "Afro-American," as if "Black" might somehow be offensive. So long as I don't here colored, nigger, or negro coming out of a non-black person's mouth, I'm cool. But no one knows what to call each other anymore. I say, let's just call a spade a spade, haha! (spoken from a Chinegro, a Blasian, an Amerasian who can basically say whatever she wants without negative repercussion--I'm considered race-neutral...I think...wait, is there such a thing?)

Too Close for Comfort

I've finally made the transition from SoBe to NYC, and have been living with my mom. We're pretty close: we work together, eat together, shop together, travel together, etc., and now we live together in her one-bedroom apartment. I appreciate our relationship, our newfound closeness, and everything she's done for me--she's the best. All that said, I feel like a child again, or at least a teenager who thinks she's grown (as all teenagers feel). The only problem is I AM GROWN. After living on my own for years in a large apartment all to myself for the most part, I am now sharing a space 1/2 the size, I've given up 1/2 my wardrobe, 1/2 of my tv-watching time--and anybody who knows me knows I need my tv time--and all of my "me" time. To top it all off, we now share the same accountant! I'm a very private person who only tells people just enough information, and now I feel like I've been forced to be completely transparent. I'm very uncomfortable with this arrangement, yet at the same time, I do appreciate her assistance in the "Get Vicky's Life Together Project." I feel like I"m stuck between a rock and a hard place: I want to be close, but I don't want to be too close. Having a talk with her about it might blow up in my face and make what looks like a good situation bad, it might hurt her feelings, and it will definitely make me look the insensitive a-hole I've been accused of being my entire life.

I think I just need my own place and my own tv. Then I can shut up about the whole friggin' thing. Except for the accountant...

Kinda Sorta Freaking Out

I just found out that I'm going to be an official New Yorker for real! I knew it was going to happen eventually, but now that the time has come, I have such bittersweet feelings about it all. I'm ready, but I'm not; I'm excited, yet wanting to stall a bit longer; ready to move, but am hesitant at the same time. These mixed emotions have been keeping me up at night even more than usual, and my mind refuses to give me any peace. TV has become one of my only temorary escapes, but my eyes hurt! I'm ready for everything to be over, or not change at all. This whole situation is killing me and renewing me simultaneously. I wish I could just wake up from all of this, but I never fell asleep in the first place...

Th Gunmother Was No Fairy

We finally met to discuss The Fairy Gunmother the other night, and the consensus was that the book was anti-climactic, confusing, and that a lot of the humor probably got lost in translation (the book was originally written in French). There were too many characters to keep track of, and hence too many back stories to follow, albeit the back stories were fun to read and added depth to the characters and made some them more memorable than others. I know this book is part of a 4 book series, but I don't believe I will be reading any more of them. Je suis desoleil, M. Pennac.

I do look forward to discussing Paradise in a couple of weeks, though. This is another challenging book that I hope the rest of the group is prepared to delve into. Similar to Fairy, there are lots of characters, but at least the honorable Ms. Morrison gave each on their own chapter, even though all the characters overlap into each other's stories. Her thoughts and plots are so deep, I'm just hoping too much won't go over my head and lead to a bland and unfocused group chat...

February Book

We haven't met to discuss Fairy Gunmother yet, but we've already voted on this month's book, which I am happy to announce, is Paradise, by one of my favorite authors of all time, Toni Morrison. I will keep you posted on our discussions, for I appreciate everyone who is emailing and calling me to say how glad they are that I'm back into blogging. So with this welcomed pressure, I will be diligent. Thanks!

For Every Step Forward...

...there's always someone or something that puts us two steps back. In this case, it's baker Ted Kefalinos at his bakery called Lafayette French Pastry in The Village, NYC, who for some reason, thought making "Drunken Negro Cookies" a good idea. You can read the disturbing article here.

With all the wonderful sentiments of hope, pride, and togetherness so much of the country felt during the inauguration of President Obama, there is still a large faction out there that refuse to accept "progress." When I hear random comments like references of the inauguration as the "iniggeration," and I see t-shirts that say, "Nigger, it's called the WHITE house," I am made all too aware of the work that still needs to be done. Will racism ever be truly eradicated? I think not, but it's a nice concept.

Hit Counters

I'm a little peeved that my hit counter for this site failed me. I was finally up to 2655 views, and had to get a new one. So now it looks like I'm a newbie and/or nobody likes me. This really sucks.

I'm through venting now...other than this little snafu, this has been an unbelievable day!

New year, new president, renewed hope!

More on this special day later...

NYC Book Club Rocks!

Last night, my book club met for our first meeting of 2009. As usual, we had a great time, and my spirited members had much to discuss about the December 2008 book of the month, The Lost Art of Keeping Secrets, by Eva Rice. Opinions varied across the board as to liking or disliking it; I was one of the naysayers. This book completely fell short of all my expectations for character development, storyline, plot (or lack thereof), and good ending (once again, or lack thereof). As I stated last night at our British venue, Pound and Pence in lower Manhattan, "If a book doesn't end well, then it's not a good book. If you like a book up until the ending--and you don't like how it ends--it's not a good book." Thanks, Toni for seconding me on that!

A few of the ladies kept saying how they enjoyed "Secrets," but kept asking questions or discussing topics within the book that revealed flaws to all of us. A couple of the highlights were noted by Krisha (pleasantly and quietly opinionated) and Marnie (a fiery one) who noted that they enjoyed when Rice narrated the banalities of everyday life; how she would randomly write about the little nuances in the characters' behavior that made them real and/or mroe special. We all agreed that that kind of writing is what makes for an enjoyable read.

However, there were some more complex issues raised as well. For example, Racquel, one of the most wonderfully opinionated women in the group, asked: "Why is it that strong women and/or promiscuous women always get punished in the end with death or some kind of disease (AIDS, cancer)?" She then drew parallels to SATC, all of which were very true. This is quite an interesting issue that I will have to address in an essay one day, but until then, much obliged to Racquel for searing this on my brain.

So, in the end, who truly liked the book? I think less people did than before we talked about it...

I'm curious to discover the opinions of our January book, Fairy Gunmother, by Daniel Pennac, one book of a French series that has been translated into English. It's gotten fantastic reviews the world over, but has yet to reckon with the eyes and minds of this fiesty group of ladies! Stay tuned...

New Year's Resolution

I know, I suck. I haven't posted anything here in almost a year. So I resolve to be more attentive and responsible to my blog this year.

In the meantime, I know some really great, artsy, funky, creatively cool peeps who formed a group a while back called Kinky Notti. Check out their music and their blog: Kinky Notti . Super nice!